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cbs special edition of "survivor: art fairs"

updated fri 9 nov 07

 

Dale Neese on thu 8 nov 07


I received this reality show takeoff from a fellow Artist of whom I expect
has participated in a few really bad Art Fairs. I have seen some photos of
recent storm damaged fairs. Not particularly funny for those losing
everything in their booths.



This CBS special edition of "Survivor: Art Fairs" will feature 32 art fair
artists next year during election year. The winner will celebrate their end
of show season by merely breaking even and covering their expenses. All the
rest will lose thousands of dollars doing art fairs, plus untold thousands
in loss of art work and displays due to natural and weather disasters.

Here are a couple of the key points.

1. All art fairs that the cast members attend will only be in economically
depressed areas, ones that are prone to natural disasters and/or have a
history of extremely violent weather.
2. Every effort will be made to be sure that the cities on the show schedule
will be good candidates for 2008 election rallies, debates and campaigning
by all top political candidates. This will add to the confusion and
attention of the dwindling public. However, this can not be guaranteed as
the schedule of these said events can change rapidly.
3. No vehicle may be used that is less than 10 years old or has an odometer
reading of less than 200,000 miles, and must have at least 2 bald tires.
Also the vehicle can not have cruise control or A/C.
4. All art fairs will be no less than 500 miles apart and none will
scheduled to coincide with the dates of each so as to make a tour possible
of one certain area of the country.
5. All art fairs must have at least a minimum entry fee of $400 with a jury
fee of no less than $45.
6. Cell phones and electronic credit card machines are strictly forbidden.
7. Any type of business replacement insurance policy is strictly forbidden.
8. The use of Priceline is strictly forbidden
9. All display equipment must be at least 10 years old and have only patched
tarps
10. And finally, all display equipment and art work has to be dollied at
least a minimum of 300 feet from your vehicle to your booth space.

Applications will soon be out for this. Please note that the older you are,
the more disabled you are and the less functional your art work is will
greatly increase your chances of being included in this show!!

PS.....this was inspired by the idea from the first paragraph of a fellow
artist, Ken Bailey.

Dale Tex
"across the alley from the Alamo"
San Antonio, Texas USA